“Upon the whole, therefore, she found, what has been sometimes found before, that an event to which she had looked forward with impatient desire, did not in taking place, bring all the satisfaction she had promised herself. "

So life continues on.  A lot of big changes are coming my way and I can't help but feel a large and unsuspecting gap starting to protrude from my expectations and what I would like to have happen.  I do not  know if this stems from complete confusion or complete indiscretion. There are ups and lows in everyone's life, but right now I feel a particular low. 

I have everything to be grateful for, God has definitely been merciful to me!  Yet I feel sad and hurt by specific instances, and this leaves me feeling worthless and alone.  This is why Sundays are so great... all these feelings are corrected and balled up to the fact the Savior has felt all of this before.  Today, I felt the spirit as I listened to my sweet cousin talk for her mission farewell.  I have noticed and decided that the confusion I feel, the craziness and the unsuspecting ideas are all made right when one is in touch with the spirit. 

In other news, I have two tests this week-Econ and Poli Sci.   I think I hate Econ.  I think I despise it more than anyone knows, but I know that it is in some ways making me a better person.  (Emphases on the SOME.)  Working two jobs really is as crazy as everyone says it is...but I desperately want to keep both to put more and more money in the bank; I do not know what the future holds, but I know the more money I have saved, the more secure I will be.

My goals for the year, while not being particularly enduring, have been gradually worked on and maybe even destroyed (i.e. workout).  I try to walk fast to school, but alas I don't think I should count that as a workout.  I am learning photoshop and taking more pictures of everything, this really helps just getting the exposure.  As for cooking it is a constant work in progress.  I am first trying to enjoy cooking, and believe it or not I am starting to enjoy parts of it!  I may not be making gourmet meals but at least I don't despise the whole process every time I go to cook something.  Maybe cooking for two helps this, I just feel bad that I have to subject the +1 to my terribleness. 

Life is life, I live it... trying to find small ways to love it and be Positive everyday.